Saturday, October 15, 2005

This is hard

I knew it wouldn't be easy, but I'm not handling things very well to be honest. I've discovered a side of me that I didn't think existed and that is taking some getting used to. Everywhere I look I see memories and we're not able to sit down together (slight problem of several thousand miles between us) to discuss what has happened and what will happen next. Part of me thinks I should accept things, move on, but another part finds that hard. Giving up on several happy years, perhaps the happiest of my life that I thought would go on for many more, is not very easy

Lots of conflicting emotions; love, hate, fear, all swirling around inside me. And as our American friends say, I haven't yet found closure.

I'll be ok, things will clear and I'll decide what a want to do with my life. But it may take a while...

We all soldier on.

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